Failure is Not Your Identity
Earlier this year I was asked on a podcast, “How do you deal with failure?”
Here’s my answer: failure is not who you are. It’s not your identity. Instead, it’s a data point—feedback that offers you a chance to grow.
This past week, I had to learn this lesson again, and I want to share it with you from the posture of a coach who is always learning.
As many of you know, I’m preparing for a backpacking trip in a few weeks and training for a 50K Spartan race in October. With these goals in mind, I’ve been pushing myself to build endurance and stamina. Last week, I decided to do a workout of 600 lunges.
Well… let’s just say my body had other plans. Two days later, I found myself hunched over, barely able to move due to severe delayed onset muscle soreness according to my DNA. As a result, I’ve been in recovery mode all week, unable to maintain my running routine.
This experience served as a vivid metaphor for life and the failures we experience.
“Failure is just part of the process, and it’s not just okay; it’s better than okay. God doesn’t want failure to shut us down. God didn’t make it a three-strikes-and-you’re-out sort of thing. It’s more about how God helps us dust ourselves off so we can swing for the fences again. And all of this without keeping a meticulous record of our screw-ups.” Bob Goff
Just this week, I spoke with a potential new client who’s on his second successful career. He reached out because he’s seeking transformational accountability. He realizes that if he keeps going at his current pace, burnout is inevitable. The emotional and financial costs of continuing on this path will be high.
So, I ask you: are you overtraining or undertraining in your life right now?
Overtraining might look like:
- Taking on consumer debt
- Working 50+ hours a week
- Doom scrolling on social media
Undertraining might look like:
- Overindulging at every meal
- Being dishonest with yourself—always thinking, “one day…”
- Letting the kids’ activities take priority over everything
In I Corinthians 9:27, Paul talks about disciplining his body for an ultimate goal. It’s not about just achieving a goal; it’s about the bigger picture.
Whether it’s achieving personal success or building a healthy team, progress is made in those quiet, dark, and mundane moments that often go unnoticed. The key difference?
- Clarity on the timeline
- Unapologetically pursuing the vision
- Ruthlessly eliminating the noise
I paid the price last week because I wasn’t radically honest with myself about my timeline, nor did I create margin to reduce distractions and focus on what mattered most.
So, where are you overtraining in your life? Where are you undertraining?
More importantly, what do you need to commit to right now to pursue holistic discipline in your leadership?
